Floor Plans That Suck

 G'day SkullFuckTards!

It's day 1 billion of the ongoing pandemic clusterfuck that won't ever go away because people are stupid as fuck and need their eyeballs popped out of their heads with a spoon - but I digress.

So I'm staring at yet another attempt by some dumbass to design a floor plan in what I can only assume is Revit, but the files I received were in Microstation so it's entirely possible that it's an unholy union of the two - but I'm also looking at a set of .pdfs generated from... who the fuck knows anymore - all I see is the plan having to completely regenerate every time I pan or move because they slapped hundreds of what appear to be lovingly crafted 3d mesh chairs (including a stack of them in a storage closet... for fucks sake).

I went into the .pdf to investigate why the plans that the engineer generated were showing several rooms with no doors on the second floor - as well as zero wall penetrations for windows or doors (and no room names/numbers - because 'why the fuck even care?').

At first I thought the plans had been modified (at which point I would have to figure out which ones were newer and hope to god it didn't totally fuck everything up), but then I started to realize I was looking at even more headers - because whoever the fuck did this fucking thing does not fucking grasp the fucking concept of fucking view range.

I honestly wish I had the time and energy to track down every single goddamned one of the cocksucking morons that generate these shitty floor plans and show them what I, a lowly 'dinosaur' CAD holdout/luddite was able to make them look like (i.e. - a functional set of plans where you can actually see things like... oh I don't know... 'doors' or whatever).

It's stunning the level of unnecessary detail that is provided for things like rollup doors (including like.. every goddamned bracket holding it together), but the most basic shit is completely overlooked (oh, and a column from a different level is shown in the middle of the door opening).

It's entirely possible that they simply hit their due date, and were forced to just chuck whatever shitty looking shit their shitty software shat out into the world - but it's equally possible they have eschewed things like 'good functional plans' for 'me am big smart, me 3d model man' (or some combination of the two).

In any case, their response would most likely be to drool, interspersed with various 'herps' and 'derps' about how their process (which they've allowed themselves to be coerced into using) is obviously 'superior' to the way we used to do things, because back then you had to... actually give a shit?

Seriously, almost every 'benefit' I've heard a BIMtard throw at me involves 'we don't have to do x or y anymore', basically meaning they aren't spending the time and effort to actually think about the project, and are just expecting their fancy (and expensive) software to figure it all out for them.

It's fucking embarrassing to see the state of the industry at this point - and these aren't just some shitty throw-away strip-mall projects either, these plans are being generated for large-scale commercial, industrial, government, and other types of projects - and they just look like unwashed assholes once you get past the 'ooh ahh' of how much unnecessary crap they shove into the plans and notice that the fundamentals are just... not fucking there.

Once I turn off (or more often simply delete) their massively over-detailed landscape furniture and other components, and start looking at the basic layouts, the holes in their designs immediately become apparent.

Then I get to manually fix just... dozens, hundreds, or even thousands of places where I'm... just not going to allow my drawings to look like this.  No.  Not today, not tomorrow, and I don't give a fuck how long it takes me - EVER.

Like I said, the only thing I wish I could do is put my finished plans next to theirs - grab them by their skulls and force them to look at the difference.  Then when they open their mouths to say literally anything at all other than 'I will strive to do better sir', I will bounce their fucking heads off the table until they lose consciousness, and then piss on them.

Fuck.  These.  People.

Sincerely,

-SkullFuck

Next Time: Still Getting Skullfucked