Tuesday, August 29, 2017

A Revit Fan Chimes In.


ACHTUNG!!!

So there I am, minding my own business, when an anonymous reader posts a fairly extensive rundown of their experience over the last 30 years in the field of Architecture.  I was intrigued, since it's fairly rare that anyone who isn't a full-on hater of Revit comments here (unless they are trolling or spamming), so I allowed myself to give them an impartial read.

Their over-arching premise seems to be that, despite ungodly amounts of time, effort, and money having been invested in it over the years, nobody has ever actually managed to take into account the needs of the design professional.  I would probably add (as I have in the past) that trying to quantify such elaborate disciplines so that any moron with a computer and a software license can do it is fairly impossible.

Pencil, rapidograph, Versacad, Microstation, Autocad, Revit (pin bar mylar drafting - thanks for the update!) overlays, etc. etc. are simply tools or techniques, each with their own advantages/disadvantages and learning curves.  The ones that have gone by the wayside (especially manual methods) had obvious constraints, but early computer systems also had their own limitations.

While my attitude towards Revit should be fairly clear to anyone with even a passing familiarity with my rants, I've always tried to stress that it is the electrical portion of the software specifically that is the focus of my disdain.  It was obvious from the get-go that it had started as an architectural tool, with the Engineering portions slapped on as an afterthought.

Obviously the Architectural/Structural portions were developed more thoroughly, so it wasn't surprising when Architects and Structural Engineers took to it like pedophiles at a poorly chaperoned field trip. It was the first time most of the people I worked with had been exposed to a 3D design tool (as I've mentioned before, I had spent years designing site and interior lighting in 3D).


Besides the advantage of more fully developed software for their disciplines, they also had the combined efforts of dozens of Architects, designers/drafters, and even one Mechanical designer who literally damned near killed himself beating his head against the Revit machine to make it work (at least something) like it was advertised.

All I had were a dozen projects at any given time to get the fuck out the door - and a couple of shitty 'tutorials' that didn't even come close to addressing what to do when you were dropped head first into the pool of shit that were early (and even later on) Revit models in a never-ending process of flux (and ironically, taking longer and longer to complete).


In theory, this would've given me longer to complete them - and made up for the extra time necessary to overcome the plethora of obstacles Revit would throw up at any given moment.  In reality, I no longer had any way of knowing what the status of my projects were any given time.  If I walk away from a CAD file, and come back to it later, it's exactly the fuck where I left it.

Even if the Architects had been busy rearranging the floor plan - as soon as I exported a new one and dropped it in, the worst that could happen is that I would need to rearrange or maybe add/delete a few things, and adjust my circuits accordingly.  If I walked away from a Revit file for even a day or two, I might come back to find everything fucked.

And that's just goddamned unacceptable.

Anyway, back to what this guy was saying.  I honestly don't know what doing large scale architecture
projects was like in ACAD, and I can imagine it could turn into an unholy nightmare - but the 'how many fucking layers does it take to design an outhouse?' comment struck me as funny, because I had developed a set of field house drawings for a school (including architectural, structural, mechanical, plumbing AND electrical).

I did the whole project in one file - without paper space, and when I was done I had maybe a dozen layers for each discipline just to keep everything straight.  Out of all of the other functions and minutiae ACAD can get you stuck fucking with, I simply don't use 99% of it.  I know quite a few of the settings/commands that can be tweaked to get the results I want (but I don't have to keep them in my head, because the Internet is a massive repository of information on ACAD).

I was amazed when I first started at my current job to find that someone had somehow allowed a metric fuckton of layers (and other junk) to invade their template - and refused to be purged.  I noticed that their files would run into trouble after a few times of cutting/pasting information (you would go to 'paste' and nothing would happen - no error, just 'derp').  I knew there had to be some relation between this and all the extra junk (that was bloating the file size).

Fortunately, after a few minutes of browsing the Internet, I ran across a command called 'write block' (-wblock), which I already knew about, but when you go to write the block, you can specify '*' and it will basically create a new file with everything in it - sans all of the embedded blocks/layers/bullshit.  The result was a smaller/leaner file without all of the bazillion layers/linetypes/etc. - and you could now cut/paste to your hearts delight.

I will admit, there are a number of commands/toggles that could be better arranged, or have better defaults (and maybe some prompts), but having been around computers (and CAD) since way before there were mice connected to them, I'm fairly adept at working my way through things - and the ACAD text window gives you a running tab of what is happening at any given time (so you know that it is having a problem instead of Revit just fucking dinging at you).

I don't use the 'ribbon' or even the classic menus - just a handful of commands in the QAT, and a few pop up menus (properties, the text window, layer manager, etc. that come up on a second screen - leaving me with just... all kinds of room to see what I'm doing.  I also love the ability to flip on viewports and be able to simultaneously look at up to eight different places in my drawing.

How I operate mostly just depends on where my left hand is at any given moment (I'm left handed - although I do keep my mouse buttons set up the same as a right hander)  if it's on the mouse, I will click a command, but if it's on the keyboard, I can quickly type a command (or shortcut - and not have to worry about hitting two keys and starting a fucking unwanted command like in Revit). 

Now, the funniest comment - having to do with pulling up an older project.  Try to do it in Revit.

The first thing you will be doing is waiting for half an hour (or more) while it upgrades to your current version (and good luck if it has any problem doing so).  Obviously if the CAD user didn't know about 'relative path' then it's easy for xrefs to get fucked up (I can feel you - because I just got done fixing nearly 200 sheets that some idiots handed over to us to do 'as builts' - including some details that the morons had saved onto their desktop instead of the folder with the rest of the files.

As far as having to drill down through every drawing and change everything to black - could you not simply plot monochrome?  (Maybe not)  But in Revit it wouldn't have been 15 seconds, because you would STILL be waiting for it to convert.  I could see where it would be a bitch to have to go back and use ACAD after having gotten to your level of Revit mastery though - I can imagine it would be like trying to issue a set of drawings on a typewriter.

I like to complain about the garbage files I get from Architects - but I do realize that the files they are sending me are dependent on Revit being able to export to CAD correctly.  What makes me amused is when I see an actual set of their sheets or .pdfs - and it's plain to see right there in their drawings due to view range fuckups (from the 16 quadrillion view range settings).  Honestly, I actually enjoy going through and cleaning up a set of drawings for my use - and it's a great way to get familiar with the building.

To tell the truth, in my current job, I usually have less problems out of Architects, and more out of Electrical Engineers/Designers (the ones whose job I used to do) who don't understand what is necessary for the systems I am designing to meet code (or even work at all).  I just got done issuing a building for a college that was showing zero sprinkler equipment, and had conflicting information for the elevator (due to a typical detail they dropped in - and nonsense on their drawing).

Hopefully one day you will get to have the pleasure of dealing with an MEP firm that is tying the Revit anchor around their balls.  Most simply can't justify the cost - especially since many are using older 'stand alone' copies of CAD (nothing that Autodesk has added in the last decade really has much affect on drafters - and you can download the latest version of TrueView for free if you need to open a newer .dwg file).

It was enough of a pain in the ass to keep up with Revit when all of the disciplines were in the same building - have fun constantly uploading/downloading massive files and watching as it eats itself (especially as Revit newbies attempt to figure out how the hell to use it, quickly burn out, and start to resent you - more than they probably already do).

Everyone can take Revit and stick it up their ass (sideways) - or use it (fuck it - it's no longer my problem).

Extraordinarily,
S.F.

Next Time: The Ever Morphing Nature Of The Revit Model

Wednesday, August 2, 2017

An Open Letter To The Revitards Who Designed This Fucking Hotel

Cheerio - Pip Pip!

I spent a few days playing 'catch-up' with the never-ending barrage of comments coming from the layers and layers of bureaucracy involved on the half-dozen or so government projects I've been trying to finish for the last year or so - and then got started on a seven story, 50,000+ s.f. hotel.

Unlike the last project I worked on, it was immediately evident this one had been modeled by a team of Revitards operating at maybe 35% brain function.  Fortunately, having spent years unfucking Revitized garbage for my use, it wasn't too difficult to get them cleaned up.

That didn't mean they weren't chock full of just... fucking sad attempts at forcing Revit to vomit up something resembling floor plans (including importing linework for kitchen/bar plans - but not bothering to look at them closely enough to actually provide a coordinated set of plans.

Then on top of that, other discipline's engineers/designers had gotten their hands on it, meaning piles of overlapping, conflicting, and otherwise view-range challenged garbage strewn everywhere.  On the upside, rather than extract 'typical' plans, the equipment I needed was all on the overall plans.

As usual, it was extremely difficult to suss out which units were accessible - since it is apparently impossible to simply label them as such (although they did have symbols denoting which ones were hearing impaired - one of which was comically disappearing under a bed).

Also, as usual, the equipment shown in the guest units didn't make logical sense - meaning that no matter how much thought I put into my design, it will be extremely surprising if I don't end up revisiting the project at least once (minimum).

I'm going to second-guess at least one thing that would require considerable reworking if the AHJ rejects the current design (which I'm almost certain they will) by calculating a heavier load for some devices, then going back and lowering it to match what they show.

I've mentioned doing this before - when equally retarded fucksticks were simply leaving necessary equipment off.  The repetition necessary to recreate the same systems unit after unit (whether doing typical units - or overall as in this case) always shows cracks.

The irony being that Revit is supposed to make it easier/faster (lies/damned lies) but as always, I go unit to unit and floor to floor and find where instead of being able to simply copy and tweak, every single device is placed in every single unit, meaning every time is a chance to overlook something.


I'm seeing lights disappear beneath sink counters (because they are mounted at the wrong height), receptacles and other devices strewn everywhere as they attached to things other than the walls they should have been attached to.  Things floating in space, things stuck halfway in walls.

And that's before you get to the myriad minor (unnecessary, and almost certainly unintended) changes from unit to unit/floor to floor - that only become clear when a template is applied to them.  Again - every wall has to be drawn, every window inserted, every piece of millwork placed.

Many times, when dealing with architects, I was able to show them that their Reviteers were fucking this type of stuff up - and in almost every case, they would make them go back and fix it (but only after it was pointed out).

There were a few project managers (that were still stuck Reviting because they wanted their projects not to be complete suckholes) who knew how to use tools in Revit to keep things consistent, but that had more to do with their experience in architecture, rather than reliance on software.

They were definitely in the minority though, as the vast majority of Revit cheerleaders were obviously having to cut any number of corners to pretend like they were successfully turning out work on par with what their non-Revit predecessors had done.


You've probably heard the old saying 'to err is human, but to really fuck things up requires a computer'.  Well - burying something in shit and destroying any chance at ever digging your way out definitely requires Revit.

It also doesn't hurt if you never leave the office, and never have to see the result of your fucktarded 'designs' being implemented by people who have to figure out how to unfuck them as millwork, countertops, and entire sections of rooms have to be custom built and/or modified.

Anyone bidding a job would do well to find out if it was designed in Revit, and include a little extra in their bid for exactly these types of contingencies.  In years past, if you were doing multiple 'identical' units, you could simply figure out the first one, and reuse those calculations.

This made for considerably faster and more consistent work - but enter the Revitized building, and every trade is having to make countless adjustments as 'coordinated' plans turn out to be sad attempts by Reviteers at cramming everything into a model at the last second.

The people in the field are left with a dilemma - build as shown (i.e. - wrong), or correct, and risk causing problems that require them to go back and adjust to what was shown (at their own expense).  I know if I were doing it, every single fuckup would be written up as a change order.

Knowing where those fuckups stemmed from would be key - as would getting past the first layer of Revit apologists who are going to try to hide those fuckups from their superiors (after adamantly denying that the fuckups exist in the first place).

Fuck inconsistency.  Fuck the Revit lies - and fuck anyone selling those lies.

And if you don't like it - Fuck You.

-SF

Next Time: A Revit Fan Chimes In.

Wednesday, July 12, 2017

How Low Can Your Standards Go?

So there I am - opening a set of drawings from an electrical engineer for a 5 story hotel.

I'm first struck by the sparseness of the sheets - especially considering that they've broken up the building into four quadrants (I was able to fit each floor onto 36"x48" sheets - although it is crammed on there).  The overall plans are only showing equipment in the corridors/common areas (oh, and they've got some of the common areas broken off into enlarged details - which they conveniently didn't provide CAD files of (fortunately I was able to locate a .pdf set).

Based on how shitty the drawings looked, I was pretty sure it had started off as a Revit file - confirmed by a quick glance at the clusterfuck of exported layers.  Whoever did the electrical design was obviously flying by the seat of their pants, slapping devices here and there, putting forth the absolute minimum effort to give a fuck as they almost certainly were having their rectum discombobulated by the Revit dick.  The fact an engineer signed off on them is just fucking sad.

Even with my formidable skills, It took quite a while to clean up the drawings (which I can't stress enough, were fucking atrocious) figure out what the fuck was going on, and actually get all of the equipment that I cared about onto one set of plans.  I will have six floor plan sheets (as opposed to their sixteen sheets - and they even had their lighting/power on the same sheets -and a typical plan for second through fourth floors) and not only will mine look fucking immaculate, they will also be 100% accurate.

When I went to put equipment from their typical units onto the plans, I was amused to find that out of eight typical plans - only five of them even had the necessary equipment shown.  In addition to this, a catch-all note was included to describe additional/alternate equipment for the accessible units (despite there already being separate plans for those accessible units). At first I thought they had the wrong keynote next to a device, but it turned out that what should've been keynote '10' was only showing '1'.

Also, thanks to one (or more) of the quarter-trillion view settings, there are a fuckton of doors missing from the plans.  Some just show openings, some show headers (some of which are missing doors, some of which are actually supposed to be openings), and one especially confusing one has a 6' sliding door.  Keep in mind, this isn't just nitpicking on my part - there is no clear path of egress on most of these plans.


They had no equipment in elevator shafts, insufficient equipment in elevator equipment rooms, and due to the parking garage that runs up through the middle of the building, they will most likely end up having to come back through and change all of the smoke detectors into carbon monoxide (or combo) detectors.  I'm going to be making a list to send to the guy who sold/quoted the job to determine if we fix these oversights/fuckups or if we just submit 'as-is' and let it get rejected.

If we do the latter, I will take the same approach as I did on the apartment building I did last year, and size everything for the additional equipment so I can just plug it in.  My co-worker just recently had a job where he knew that they were going to need a bunch of extra equipment, so he simply put the additional equipment/wiring/etc. on a separate layer - so when it came back rejected (as we knew it would), he just flipped a few layers on and off, and 'voila'.

Of course, then they ended up making additional changes that couldn't have been predicted (par for the course there).  Based on how little thought was put into slapping these drawings together, I have very little doubt that other things (like codes, local requirements, etc.) were also overlooked - meaning I will most likely end up back in these drawings again - possibly even redoing them almost from scratch as I have others in the past - thanks to nobody giving a fuck until (way) after the fact.


The funniest part is that, aside from anyone I grumble to about it, nobody will realize the amount of thought I have put into it (especially if all of that thought gets negated by a complete redesign).  I've got another recent project that was a renovation of a small building at a waste treatment plant.  The client told us exactly what they wanted to do, so we did it (well, at least I did after deciphering the nonsense that the guy who quoted it shat out).  Then at a meeting yesterday, they did a complete 180.

Fortunately our office manager was at both meetings (due to the guy who quoted it being an alcoholic with a fucked up back that keeps him home a lot of the time) - otherwise (as he even admitted), he wouldn't have believed that it was the client's doing, but misunderstanding on our part.  This was especially important, because he was in a position to then request additional money from the client, since it constituted a complete redesign (after the original one had already been completed AND submitted to the city for review).

That last part is the kicker, because while we could contact the city and tell them not to bother reviewing the first set, that could open a whole other can of worms.  Instead, we're going to let it go forward 'as-is', and then reissue - at which point, everyone's time/money will have been wasted (all due to a clueless client, who really should've known better).  Oh - and to pile irony on it, the work we are doing on the building itself is only a temporary fix to alleviate a much larger problem.

Within two years, that building most likely won't even be there anymore - and the vast majority of what we are doing is to allow personnel to remotely operate equipment in that building (and tie into the adjacent university so they can monitor trouble signals).  Given that the AHJ will have reviewed the first set (and will almost certainly reject it), it will look very much like the client (or our firm) is trying to get around their rejection (based on a building that doesn't come close to meeting code).

I really should've known when I issued the first set of drawings that something was wrong, because it all went smoothly and made logical sense - but that's the world we live in.  The only up side is that I didn't waste countless hours fighting Revit to generate a set of shitty looking drawings, only to find out that it was all for naught.  I'll be drawing a couple of diagrams/schematics, our people already know how to install the shit, and despite all of the attempts to prevent it - we'll actually turn a healthy profit.

Fuck the low standard that Revit has allowed people to drop to - and fuck anyone perpetuating the Revit myth.

And if you don't like it - Fuck You.

Sincesquarely,
-SKuLLFuCK-

Next Time:Let Me Tell You Why Your Model Sucks

Monday, June 26, 2017

Still Not Convinced To Choke On The Revit Dick?

Que Onda Skullfuckarinos?

I was just flipping through some of the nonsensical garbage on the AUGI site when I ran across this extensive buzzword laden screed from human dildo 'Jay Zallan' that literally sounds exactly like the 'drink the kool-aid' bullshit that was being hurled at the architecture/engineering community over five years ago when I first started the Revit MeP Skullfuck: https://www.augi.com/articles/detail/reconstructing-the-aec-practice-success-in-aeco-bim-revit

The saddest part is the fact that it was written (or at least posted) in August 2016 and seems to be yet another in a long line of attempts to convince people that the way they've (successfully) been doing things is WRONG and that BIMming the Revit way is the only way - I mean, how stupid or set in your ways do you have to be to not understand this?

He goes through the same fucking litany as his predecessors (although I seriously doubt this is his first time chastising everyone who isn't him).  BIM is the future (but isn't software - or a process), Revit is the best, ACAD sucks, people who want to keep using ACAD are 'addicted', comparing CAD holdouts to those who were resistant to switching from hand drafting to computers, opining the fact that if everyone would just be on 'the team' (yay team!) then OMG ya'll - everything would just be rainbows and sparkle ponies!!!


If he weren't on the same condescending power trip as every other Revitard out there, some of his suggestions about how to go about transitioning a firm to BIM/Revit would be adorable.  He's careful to distinguish it as a 'revolution' (ironically - from the Latin 'revolutio' meaning 'to turn around', which certainly describes Revit) as opposed to an 'evolution' (which could indicate growth/progress). Some of his suggestions are actually quite good (if not a tad unrealistic) but are all subverted by an undying devotion to what he views as 'The Way'.

It's also telling in how quickly he dismisses his 'holdout' strawman's concerns about whether or not things can be done in 'BIM authoring software' (by which he exclusively means Revit), the appearance of tags/notes/etc. (because how dare you question how Revit WILL make your drawings look?) and then starts doing the Revit self-suck by insulting the intelligence, experience, and dedication to productivity of those who see through the smokescreen.

I think I've made this analogy before - but I could see this guy strutting into an automobile repair shop with a handful of adjustable wrenches and telling the mechanics that they no longer need a box full of different sized wrenches and sockets.  He would talk endlessly about how 'adjustable wrenches are the future of mechanic work', dismiss any concerns about the (obvious) problems, insult anyone who refused to comply, and disregard demonstrable limitations to the tool he has so graciously bestowed upon the lowly peons (who are responsible for productivity/profitability).

After taking away the rest of their tools, he would occasionally catch one trying to put an extension/socket that they snuck in on a bolt that the wrench cannot reach, and then turn it with the adjustable wrench - at which point he would say 'huh... they shouldn't put bolts where an adjustable wrench can't get on them - see if you can do the job without taking that bolt off'.  Right about then, another mechanic would yell for the third time that morning as the wrench slipped, rounded off the bolt, and resulted in him busting his knuckles (four hours into a job that should've taken ten minutes).

He would then proceed into the manager's office to tell them that in order for the shop to be 'transformed', that it will be necessary to figure out what goals are truly desired (as long as those goals are in line with his 'adjustable wrench only' policy), then to 'create plans intended to accomplish those goals', and finally 'commit to and complete the necessary actions in those plans'.  Oh - and the jobs still need to be completed on time (wrenches down!).

Fuck this guy - and every self-centered fuckfaced idiot out there like him.  Fuck Autodesk, Fuck Revit, Fuck 'BIM', and If You Don't Like It - FUCK YOU.

Next Time: The Saddest Set Of Electrical Drawings Ever Shat Out Of Revit

Monday, June 12, 2017

Revit 2018 MeP is 'Path-etic'.

Fuck You And The Revit You Rode In On Bitch!!!

It's that time again - 2018 Revit has been out for a couple of weeks, just long enough for dumbfucks to start installing it and fucking over anyone who had a project to complete, but are now are having to deal with god only fucking knows what.

Literally the only 'electrical improvement' that I could find on any of the various dipshit lists that faggots make of this ignorant-ass shit was something reader 'Hysteresis' had already mentioned regarding being able to manually edit the circuit path.

First off - why the fuck couldn't you always manually edit the circuit path?  Although, in reality - who gives a shit?  Nobody is going to fucking install the goddamned conduit the way you show on a design (and how many extra goddamned drawings are you going to have in your set to show every 3d conduit elevation, etc.?!?!)

As always, the 'partially schematical' set of drawings is what will get issued (and trust me - no contractor is going to waste their time with your shitty model), and conduit routing will be part of the Electrical Contractors 'means and methods'.  Getting a rough idea of how long a circuit is going to be can be helpful in calculating voltage drop (and thus wire size) , but I wouldn't trust Revit to calculate a tip.

I issued hundreds and hundreds of projects over the 12+ years I was doing Electrical Design - calculating voltage drop for countless loads, and thanks to having tools that I could trust not to fuck me - I never once had one come back with problems.  Now in my current job, I have tried and true spreadsheets to allow me to easily enter loads and calculate voltage drops as well.

Never once have I been doing a design and thought to myself 'you know what would make this easier?  Having a program of questionable quality that requires me to do more work in order to 'save time and effort - and that might fuck me over at any time'.  We actually had some guy contact someone at my office trying to foist some software that they developed that is specific to the types of systems that I design now, but after looking over what they had to offer, it didn't intrigue me in the least.

The fact is -any effort I expend that could be automated is more than made up for by the fact that simply by being that involved in every aspect of the project, I'm going to catch every mistake, contradiction, or oversight made by the people who did the initial design/pricing.  As I've mentioned on multiple occasions, at my previous firm, there was almost no end to the major fuckups that I would find in other disciplines work - simply because I was ACTUALLY LOOKING AT THE SHIT.

Add to that the irony that these fuckups were all coming from the very same people telling me how great it feels to apply the set of electroshock nipple clamps that is Revit.

I just finished another spectacular design - a 45,000 s.f. rehab facility (the one where they tried to foist a Revit model off on me), and I probably spent as much time cleaning up their wack floor plans as I did doing my schematics and details.  Oh, and in between starting and completing it - I pulled off and completed a 230,000 s.f. parking garage project (that included some fairly extensive rework of an existing fiber-optic network.

It's just... fucking amazing how much shit I can accomplish without Revit.  Even more amazing is the improvement in my overall well-being when there no expectation that I ever start using it.  I've got a few other systems to finish up on a roughly 90,000 s.f. assisted living facility - then I'm going to be diving headfirst into completion of a massive set of drawings that I inherited to do 'as builts' for on a huge power plant renovation.

The set consists of over 200 goddamned drawings (and associated conduit/wire/device schedule spreadsheets - required by the owner).  The reason for the sheer number of drawings is primarily because (while they weren't using Revit at least) the people who originally did it were stupid as fuck. It would've been a formidable undertaking for anyone, but a little common fucking sense at the beginning of the project could've kept things consolidated, and much easier to keep track of.

The main reason I took it over was that the contractor is pretty much stuck at the job site (and a rather large sum of money is tied up) until the project is finalized, and the dipshits responsible for generating hundreds of sheets were taking weeks to slog through what I can do in days.  I've worked with the same contractor on a generator building at a nuclear facility - and they were blown the fuck away by how responsive I am to their needs, and the quality of my work.

And, to reiterate - none of it involved having to fuck around with Revit, because FUCK REVIT.

And if you don't like it - FUCK YOU TOO, YOU BRAIN DAMAGED COCK SUCKER.

Cordially,

><>SKÜLLFÜCK<><

Next Time: Apologetic Apoplectic.

Monday, June 5, 2017

How Many Notes Would a Keynote Key if a Keynote Could Key Notes?

All the Revit Shit That's Fit To Fucking Print.

So I'm kicking ass and taking names - when I see a comment from reader 'Christopher Lord' pop up.  Apparently he was running into issues with Key Notes (not surprising considering that Revit has had issues with Key Notes not working properly ever since Revit has been a thing).

Some quick googling came up with a 'known issue' (it's always a 'known issue - and Autodesk is totally working on it man...) with Key Notes disappearing when upgrading from 2016 to 2017 (no big deal there right?).  At my previous firm we would usually come in one day to find that some dipshit had saved the Revit file to the newest version, meaning that we got to jump feet (and dick) first into the newest version.

So there you are, job almost ready to kick out, and BANG - keynotes are fucked.  You google it, praying to whatever god you believe in that somebody has found some kind of 'workaround' (maybe involving adjusting one of the 1/4 trillion plus view settings).

Hell yes - there it is!  Someone describing exactly the problem I'm having, complete with a simple workaround! We're saved!!!  Oh wait - it isn't working.  Ok - breathe, back to google.  Another hit!  Oh... it's just someone begging for a solution - and someone else 'helpfully' pointing out that it's a 'known issue'.


One of the funniest I ran across was a guy saying that 'this issue has shaken my love for Revit to the core': https://www.revitforum.org/dynamo-bim/34163-2017-key-notes-disappearing-dymano-fix.html

That's what you get for having love for Revit you dickless piece of shit 'DMapes'.  It fucks you directly in the ass.  If I had time to waste, I could probably find where this guy had berated other people who were forced into Reviting and were running into fucked up problem after fucked up problem for not sharing his 'love'.

I've read countless instances of people leaning on Revit - putting all of their trust into it to do right by them, only to have it fail miserably.  The fact is - YOU CANNOT TRUST REVIT.  It's a fucking lie - propagated by people operating off of what is called the 'sunk cost fallacy'.

Basically, if you are a firm, you've spent literal shit-tons of money to buy Revit licenses, upgrade computers, servers, networks, etc. to handle it, had it eat profits as your employees struggle to figure out how to force the goddamned thing to shart out a passable set of drawings (and even more if you wasted money on 'training'.

If you are a user - you've spent god only knows how many hours beating on Revit, fucking with settings, watching stupid videos, reading stupid blogs, hunting the internet for shreds of information on how to make this goddamned thing work as advertised - and watched as projects that should've been cranked out in days take weeks, months, or even years as teams of Revitards all shit on and/or fling shit all over each other.

There's a point you reach where you won't (or can't) admit that it's fucked - because rather than the blame falling squarely on the shoulders of the ones churning out the garbage software, it's been you - pushing yourself (and others) off the cliff, swearing the whole time that 'it gets better'.

Supposedly the 2017.2 version fixed the Key Note problem (again - since this isn't the first time this shit happened - both to Key Notes specifically, and any number of other things in between updates - or when it just decides to take a shit one day).  Now - the problem is, installing that update may very well fuck something else up.

And you won't know until you are already sailing through the air - legs, dong, and balls flapping in the breeze - heading towards the giant Revit wood chipper at the bottom of the cliff.

Fuck That.

Fuck Revit, Fuck Autodesk, Fuck Revitards, Fuck Revit Gurus, and fuck anyone unwilling to admit they got FUCKED by Revit.

Sincerely,
<<<SKvLLFvCK>>>

Next Time: Path-etic.

Tuesday, May 30, 2017

Now, Was That So Fucking Hard?

Imagine there's no Revit - it's easy if you try...

Welp... I managed to beat everything I needed out of the Reviteers (again) so I can actually get to work on their project.  I remember a long time ago (at another firm) we came up with a list of what we had to have in order to start a project.  One of the first items on the list was a floor plan that had been approved by the owner (or owner's representative).

Obviously there might still be changes, tweaks, etc. - but it gave you a starting point.  If this was not forthcoming, then any schedule someone might try to set was meaningless - and we would tell them as much (whether or not they were paying attention was another thing).

Now, it's sad that we would have to explain to someone that we can't do our job until you do your job - but that's the way it was.  Then Revit comes stumbling onto the stage like a drunken fratboy into a nightclub - just waving its flaccid whiskey dick all over the place.

All of a sudden there's no standard anymore, and anything some dickless fucktard shits out in it is what you get to work with. We still had some kind of requirement for 'your shitty model must be at least 75% complete before we allow you to wedge it into our rectums' or some such.

The problem is that nobody could define what percentage 'complete' a model was at any given point - this was a boon for the idiots stuffing their dicks into the Revit grinder on a daily basis.  They could get it to spit out a 'floor plan' and maybe even a 'reflected ceiling plan' and claim it was ready to go.

Five minutes later (4 minutes and 45 seconds of waiting for their model to load), it would be painfully obvious that they had pulled some serious voodoo Reviteering to get it to spit those plans out, because attempting to start laying out my equipment would find me spinning in circles.

Every time I would save to central, there would be something FUBAR.  The wall you hosted all of those panels to?  Gone.  The room that they gave you for those panels (that they jokingly asked you how big it needed to be)?  Cut in half - because someone forgot to make room for HVAC units, water heaters, elevator equipment, or a sprinkler riser.

Put in some lights?  Oh - sorry, we deleted and/or changed the type of ceiling.  Put in some switches? Oh - we flipped those doors around and moved them.  Receptacles? Oh - there is a countertop there now, with a microwave on it, and a range with a hood, and a refrigerator, and some vending machines.  Oh - and an eyewash station that needs an instantaneous electric water heater that pulls insane amounts of power (did we mention that there will be 7-8 of those throughout the building?)

Made the mistake of wiring any of that shit up?  Congratulations, you would be better off starting over.  Your panels are now the wrong size, in the wrong locations (and prior to a certain release - couldn't be moved once they had a certain number of circuits in them).

The disconnect switches you put in for those HVAC units (that you had to insert and then fill out based on the mechanical schedules - instead of everything magically working by itself)? They just decided to switch from a chiller with VAV boxes to split systems (oh - and now there are a handful of closets for air handlers that just fucked up 50% of the device locations, lights, etc. that you spent hours meticulously putting in).

Then they decide to do something that REALLY fucks you up (or Revit just decides to take a shit) and something that you desperately need to work NOW, refuses to work.  Then you get to spend an hour in a circle jerk with the Revitards/Revit Gurus.

And what part of that doesn't sound like fun?

On the up side, I was having a conversation with an older guy today, and he mentioned something offhand about ACAD being strictly 2D.  Ironically the guy knew that ACAD had been used for years to design parts to be sent to machine tools - but I was able to give him a quick tour of ACAD's formidable 3D abilities.


Not that I need any of that to do my job now (or my old job for that matter).

Fuck Revit, fuck the dumb shit - and if you are not of the liking it variety, then fuck off you shall.

Next Time: Did You Really Need To See Those Key Notes?