Monday, April 29, 2013

Where does the money go?

I'm looking at a 3D model of a building in Revit right now - it is fairly impressive, especially considering that it is an existing building that some people at my firm painstakingly recreated from old documents, and field measurements.

This was the contract agreement - not just something someone decided to take on because Revit is 'Teh Bomb'.  And I can understand a facility like the one that the building is part of wanting to have a fully integrated 3D model of all of their buildings, systems, etc.

I can also guarantee that anything resembling a 'budget' for this project was decimated before one floor of this fucking building was laid out because in order to *get* the project, they had to outbid other firms and secure the contract.

If Autodesk had spent a fraction of the money developing it's software that it spent convincing everyone in the industry that they needed to start doing twelve times as much work for the same (or less) fee, then we might be looking at a functional piece of software.

Instead, they went the cheap route by buying a half-ass piece of shit, and then polishing that fucking turd until it shone a dull brown and then started vigorously hurling it at unsuspecting customers and demanding to be paid thousands of dollars a seat.

I've designed two renovated floors of this monstrosity of a building (oh - did I mention they modeled the whole goddamned thing so that most of it could be gutted and renovated?).  I did both in ACAD (because seriously - fuck Revit), and ended up getting dicked over anyway as every second that I had spent carefully attempting to gather information on all of the various pieces of equipment the owner was going to have, and which required power.

Of course they could not be troubled with providing any information - past a brochure that contained zero information, and contacting the manufacturer was pointless unless you had the exact purchase order for the exact piece of equipment they were going to order, with the exact options they were going to select (which of course, the owner won't provide you - because not even they know).

I was bitched at repeatedly for not using Revit on this project - primarily because 'omg, what if the owner finds out we're totally not Reviting it?!?' - which is a relevant concern, except that the renovations have been done using a set of 2d pieces of paper, which will then go in an archive, to be referred to, while the Revit model will sit on a server somewhere - but won't be able to be opened by anyone that doesn't have a workstation with a current copy of Revit (it probably won't be the same version it was created in) then they can have fun watching it convert for half an hour - and really have fun when Autodesk decides to make changes that won't allow it to update, and leave it completely useless.

Of course, most of the bitching was actually due to the amount of work they had to put into this model that sits before me this morning, and knowing that I was just exporting it out to ACAD so that I could make a profit - assuming Architectural didn't eat the entire budget for the project (which they most certainly did). 

Now we are renovating another floor - I have plans set up in Revit, and a stack of 'information' that someone managed to extract from the customer - .which is mostly just a layout.  Any electrical information (as usual) was purely incidental - scribbled by someone who didn't know what they were talking about (or knew just enough to be dangerous).

I am at the crossroads of Revit and ACAD right now. 

With a series of clicks, this thing can be in ACAD, and I can be laying it out, and putting together a set of construction documents.

Or - with a different series of clicks I can still be staring at the exact same thing I've been staring at all morning.  An impressive looking, but for all means and purposes, completely useless model that it gains me nothing to populate with electrical information when I already have a system and software that allows me to concentrate on the actual task at hand, instead of fighting Revit every step of the way.

Oh well - I'll be back soon with some more vicious attacks on POS Reviteers (that they absolutely deserve).

Until then, fuck Revit, fuck Autodesk, and if you don't like what I'm saying - then (with all due respect) please shut your fucks to their full upright position!!!

Wednesday, April 24, 2013

Making More Work

I promised - and now I deliver.

Whoever this stupid fuck is - they, and the fuckhead they were listening to need to get fucked:

Yet another fucking architect lackey, clueless about anything past the tip of their goddamned nose, trying to give you a history of engineering, drafting, etc. in an attempt to quantify what it is that MEP engineers do.

Apparently they went and listened to some dickless fuckface 'Ron Balmer' (due to her misspelling I will from here on out refer to him as 'Rom'.  Rom apparently jacked (and jilled?) off a bunch of sad, pathetic pieces of shit at the '505 BIM Users Group'

They are convinced that the entrance of CAD into the MEP engineer/designers world magically made less work for the engineer (by 'half or more' - source: they just made that shit up).  There were obviously advantages for the drafter - but as the computer made the process faster, it also it easier to make mistakes, and have them propagate throughout a set of drawings (if not multiple projects).

If you didn't sit down and engineer the shit out of every single project - on paper, CAD, or BIM - you are going to get fucked by the Architect, the contractor, and the owner - repeatedly.

They claim it took them a week for it to 'hit them' (I'll fucking hit them - so hard their teeth will be embedded in the back of their fucking skull) that although this made for more work on the MEP engineers part, that didn't matter because (insert bullshit here).

Then they toss out one about engineers needing to be more 'flexible' (I'll show them flexible when I break their fucking back).  How about being flexible enough to let me use whatever goddamned software I want - you go and make a happy fucking rendering, and then go fuck yourself?

One of this fucktards more recent posts even has this little tidbit 'Of course Autodesk can re-brand their logo but can't give Revit a text editor as good as the one as they have in Autocad.' 

Hahaha!  Isn't that a good one?  Autodesk is too busy coming up with new faggot fuck logos for it's company:

Autodesk 2D and 3D Design and Engineering Software

And it's software:


To actually fix the glaring problems with even the most basic functions in Revit - despite most of them having been on various wishlists for nearly a decade (while Revit apologists deny that any such problems exist).

I'm sure 2014 will be making it's way onto my computer soon - I've read over a few reviews of what they've 'fixed' and 'added', none of which seemed to sound like they were going to actually turn this stinking pile of dog shit into functional software - but hey, we can always hope right?

No - stop hoping now.  Despite a pathetic attempt at trying to re-brand itself and it's software, Autodesk Revit will continue to suck balls.

I'll be looking for more clueless Revtards - until next time.

Tuesday, April 2, 2013

Budgetized Revitization

Alright, so you've heard me bitch about people not having any concept of budgets - especially when it comes to the amount of extra time that it takes to develop even a basic floor plan in Revit.  Well I recently found out something interesting.

We just finished a project where the entire budget was blown by the Architects (and I don't mean the Architectural budget - I mean the entire budget for the entire job - well over $70K) before they even had an approved floor plan!!!

That's right - every cent blown, while still in the Schematic Design stage.

What that says to me is that they sat down and Revited the shit out of it, while still not knowing exactly what the owner wanted, and then proceeded to Revit the shit out of it over and over until they had it right - instead of simply putting together a 2D floor plan for the owner to sign off on.

Putting all of their elevations, details, etc. together - only to find out that half of their work had to be redone was a waste of fucking time, money, and effort.  The lead Architect on this particular project is an excellent designer and coordinator (mainly because he is old-school - I've had the guy bring me more than one hand-sketched drawing to explain something), however he has been saddled with a team of Reviteers since it is the 'office standard' now.

This would be the equivalent of a mechanic deciding to completely rebuild every engine that comes in for an oil change.

Or a dentist performing a root-canal and putting a crown on every single tooth in a guys head who comes in for a routine cleaning.

They wouldn't make any fucking profit, it would take waaaaaaay longer than the customer has to do it, and while the customer might think they were getting a pretty good value, assuming neither adjusted their fees accordingly (which if they did, they wouldn't have any customers anymore - 'why is an oil change $5000?", the reality would be that it is unsustainable.

The theory was that at some point we would figure out how to use Revit more efficiently, eliminating some vague redundancies that nobody could ever really say what they were (pun intended).  Instead, it has taken longer, cost more, and that's before you even get to the $5K a seat cost for the software.

They kept telling me 'it might take longer at first' (meaning: 'you get to stay here for as long as necessary to complete the job, since the schedule stays the same, and do it free of charge, because there is no extra budget to cover overtime), but that I could start identifying things that took less time, and eventually reach the point where it was as fast or faster than my previous methods (i.e. ACAD).

We reached a point where the Architects actually started to believe their own bullshit - and no amount of grabbing them by the face and forcing them to look at the reality on the ground could sway their faith.  Some of them prefer working in Revit now - which would be all fine and good if they could do it in a timely manner, and not drag everyone else into their hell (hint: they can't).

Then to have the balls to start trying to shame me into joining them on their sinking ship since the software couldn't stand on it's own merit and required insulting, threatening, or otherwise demeaning anyone who would dare speak against it, or refuse to use it.

Reading various blogs/posts shows that this attitude is systematic.  Someone will post a question about how to do something, and then get excoriated by Revitbots (most of whom you can tell don't actually work in the design field).

Here's an example from last year:

The person who posted was obviously extremely frustrated with Revit, may have not had any training, or been as experienced in design (they were coming from ArchiCAD) - but holy motherfucking god, listen to the self-absorbed egotistical fucks that respond to it:

"Wow you're a true dork in all senses of the word.  As in clueless and ignorant. LMAO"

"In fact my advise (sic) to your customers is to fire you and get a real designer who knows what they are doing."

"all you're actually accomplishing with your rediculous (sic) blog and these silly posts is "MAKING YOURSELF LOOK STUPID"

Now, those pale in comparison to the bitch-slapping that I would give 'dgcad' (which I believe is actually an acronym for 'D.ick G.ushing D.iet') once I got done fucking his mom - if you keep scrolling down it turns into a Revit circle-jerk-athon of epic proportions.  

They've got these over-simplified 'solutions' for every one of his concerns, ignoring the important fact that THEY KNOW FULL WELL THAT NOT EVERYTHING WORKS IN REVIT.  Shit that is completely out of your control can fuck you into a hole in the ground.

I'm sure every single one of them has burned entire mornings or afternoons (or days/weeks/months/years/budgets/schedules/etc.) trying to figure out a workaround or solution to what should be a simple problem, only to have to end up faking it in, and yet to listen to them - there is no way it's the software or lack of concern on the part of its 'developers'.

The aforementioned project that the Architects burned the entire budget on had a clusterfuck of referenced models (not Revit's fault - but not mine either) and while I was on vacation they moved the electrical room.  Another electrical designer moved the panels, but two of them (that were hosted into a wall in the shell building) absolutely refused to move.

They brought all of the Revit 'gurus' down to try to figure it out - and finally had to resort to simply hiding the panels, and faking the new ones in (to prevent having to delete them and start from fucking scratch).

That is one small example - one that 'might' have had a solution, but we've got projects to get out the door - we can't be hunting down solutions every time this piece of shit decides to hiccup, so we 'fake it in' again.  It's all fine and good - unless we have to revisit that project in the future, and remember what all was faked.

I'm going to do a little bit of hunting around for the next couple of posts - I've called out a few Revitbots and Autodesk shills in the past, but I've really only scratched the surface.  Oh - and before anyone tries to call me out on how insulting and degrading I am to Revit users, Autodesk, and Revit in general, keep in mind - I'm not the one trying to tell people how to do their jobs.

I am going to try to be impartial, fair, and productive (hahaha - who am I kidding I'm going to tear these faggot fucks new assholes with the steel toe of my size 14 Doc Martins!!!)

As always, if you don't like it - go fuck yourself.