Imagine there's no Revit - it's easy if you try...
Welp... I managed to beat everything I needed out of the Reviteers (again) so I can actually get to work on their project. I remember a long time ago (at another firm) we came up with a list of what we had to have in order to start a project. One of the first items on the list was a floor plan that had been approved by the owner (or owner's representative).
Obviously there might still be changes, tweaks, etc. - but it gave you a starting point. If this was not forthcoming, then any schedule someone might try to set was meaningless - and we would tell them as much (whether or not they were paying attention was another thing).
Now, it's sad that we would have to explain to someone that we can't do our job until you do your job - but that's the way it was. Then Revit comes stumbling onto the stage like a drunken fratboy into a nightclub - just waving its flaccid whiskey dick all over the place.
All of a sudden there's no standard anymore, and anything some dickless fucktard shits out in it is what you get to work with. We still had some kind of requirement for 'your shitty model must be at least 75% complete before we allow you to wedge it into our rectums' or some such.
The problem is that nobody could define what percentage 'complete' a model was at any given point - this was a boon for the idiots stuffing their dicks into the Revit grinder on a daily basis. They could get it to spit out a 'floor plan' and maybe even a 'reflected ceiling plan' and claim it was ready to go.
Five minutes later (4 minutes and 45 seconds of waiting for their model to load), it would be painfully obvious that they had pulled some serious voodoo Reviteering to get it to spit those plans out, because attempting to start laying out my equipment would find me spinning in circles.
Every time I would save to central, there would be something FUBAR. The wall you hosted all of those panels to? Gone. The room that they gave you for those panels (that they jokingly asked you how big it needed to be)? Cut in half - because someone forgot to make room for HVAC units, water heaters, elevator equipment, or a sprinkler riser.
Put in some lights? Oh - sorry, we deleted and/or changed the type of ceiling. Put in some switches? Oh - we flipped those doors around and moved them. Receptacles? Oh - there is a countertop there now, with a microwave on it, and a range with a hood, and a refrigerator, and some vending machines. Oh - and an eyewash station that needs an instantaneous electric water heater that pulls insane amounts of power (did we mention that there will be 7-8 of those throughout the building?)
Made the mistake of wiring any of that shit up? Congratulations, you would be better off starting over. Your panels are now the wrong size, in the wrong locations (and prior to a certain release - couldn't be moved once they had a certain number of circuits in them).
The disconnect switches you put in for those HVAC units (that you had to insert and then fill out based on the mechanical schedules - instead of everything magically working by itself)? They just decided to switch from a chiller with VAV boxes to split systems (oh - and now there are a handful of closets for air handlers that just fucked up 50% of the device locations, lights, etc. that you spent hours meticulously putting in).
Then they decide to do something that REALLY fucks you up (or Revit just decides to take a shit) and something that you desperately need to work NOW, refuses to work. Then you get to spend an hour in a circle jerk with the Revitards/Revit Gurus.
And what part of that doesn't sound like fun?
On the up side, I was having a conversation with an older guy today, and he mentioned something offhand about ACAD being strictly 2D. Ironically the guy knew that ACAD had been used for years to design parts to be sent to machine tools - but I was able to give him a quick tour of ACAD's formidable 3D abilities.
Not that I need any of that to do my job now (or my old job for that matter).
Fuck Revit, fuck the dumb shit - and if you are not of the liking it variety, then fuck off you shall.
Next Time: Did You Really Need To See Those Key Notes?
Tuesday, May 30, 2017
Friday, May 19, 2017
WTF?!?!?!?!
Good God.
Another idiot sent me a link to a download of 'CAD' files - only to find out that the only .dwg was a Civil drawing (in related news - if you are considering going to school for engineering, and don't want to have the Revit dick jammed up into your guts, Civil Engineering might be the way to go).
I actually have access to student versions of all of Autodesk's software, but like fuck I'm going to install p.o.s. Revit on my machine, only to then waste my time downloading a 255mb central file, and another 65.7mb MEP file just so I can export that bullshit out to CAD.
Of course, nobody involved with the project on this end even knows what the fuck 'Revit' is (nor should they), and attempts to contact the morons that uploaded these files haven't resulted in any responses (mainly because it's hard to respond to phone calls and e-mail when you've got Revit jammed up your ass (along with your head).
I actually opened their link again today - and found that someone had exported a floor plan (good on 'em), but still no MEP, and only a .pdf (revised from the previous drawing) showing half of the building.
For all I know, the half they are showing might represent my entire scope, but because they are dicking around sending half-ass shit, who even fucking knows at this point? Sure as fuck not the idiots (in one of our remote offices) who sent me the project to work on.
I was about to relent and just use the CAD background and start slapping my devices on it, but between the fact that I don't know if I'm supposed to do both halves of the building (and the fact that they failed to make a .pdf of their legend) now I'm going to double-down on them meeting my demands before I waste a nother second looking at it.
Obviously this kind of fuckery could exist even if Revit didn't, but as I've repeatedly said in the past - Revit seems to breed this type of shitty communication and half-ass project management. The people who should be thinking, reasoning, and sharing are simply too busy and/or burned out trying to shart out something even remotely passable from Revit to give a shit about anything or anyone else.
I've started writing an e-mail trying to explain the situation to the guy who first sent me the project THREE FUCKING TIMES, and have deleted it each time because (just like every time I run into this issue) I can't seem to figure out a way to convey what should be obvious as fuck to them without basically telling them to suck my goddamn asscrack.
I need the same fucking shit that I ask for on every single goddamned job we ever do - same as always. Instead I get clueless looks (or tones of voice) like it's the first time I've ever asked for it. If I don't take the initiative, they will just assume it's being done.
I think the problem is that what I need is (or should be) so goddamned simple, that it feels stupid to get up in arms about it, but if I don't, then goddamn it and fuck...
Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck FUCK...
This has been another go fuck yourself Revit moment - brought to you by the fucking assholes and faggots that 'develop', sell, propagate, and use Revit. Even when you aren't using it, it somehow still finds a way to get in the way of your productivity.
Fuck Revit, Fuck Autodesk, Fuck Reviteers, Fuck Revitards, and Fuck Goddamned Incompetent Motherfucking Fuckfaced Fuckheads.
They can all eat a bag of dicks. And I don't want to find half of them shoved up their asses like last time. EAT YOUR DICKS.
Sincerely,
<<<[[[SKuLLFuCK]]]>>>
Next Time: I Rip Off Some Reviteers Head And Shit Down His Fucking Throat.
Another idiot sent me a link to a download of 'CAD' files - only to find out that the only .dwg was a Civil drawing (in related news - if you are considering going to school for engineering, and don't want to have the Revit dick jammed up into your guts, Civil Engineering might be the way to go).
I actually have access to student versions of all of Autodesk's software, but like fuck I'm going to install p.o.s. Revit on my machine, only to then waste my time downloading a 255mb central file, and another 65.7mb MEP file just so I can export that bullshit out to CAD.
Of course, nobody involved with the project on this end even knows what the fuck 'Revit' is (nor should they), and attempts to contact the morons that uploaded these files haven't resulted in any responses (mainly because it's hard to respond to phone calls and e-mail when you've got Revit jammed up your ass (along with your head).
I actually opened their link again today - and found that someone had exported a floor plan (good on 'em), but still no MEP, and only a .pdf (revised from the previous drawing) showing half of the building.
For all I know, the half they are showing might represent my entire scope, but because they are dicking around sending half-ass shit, who even fucking knows at this point? Sure as fuck not the idiots (in one of our remote offices) who sent me the project to work on.
I was about to relent and just use the CAD background and start slapping my devices on it, but between the fact that I don't know if I'm supposed to do both halves of the building (and the fact that they failed to make a .pdf of their legend) now I'm going to double-down on them meeting my demands before I waste a nother second looking at it.
Obviously this kind of fuckery could exist even if Revit didn't, but as I've repeatedly said in the past - Revit seems to breed this type of shitty communication and half-ass project management. The people who should be thinking, reasoning, and sharing are simply too busy and/or burned out trying to shart out something even remotely passable from Revit to give a shit about anything or anyone else.
I've started writing an e-mail trying to explain the situation to the guy who first sent me the project THREE FUCKING TIMES, and have deleted it each time because (just like every time I run into this issue) I can't seem to figure out a way to convey what should be obvious as fuck to them without basically telling them to suck my goddamn asscrack.
I need the same fucking shit that I ask for on every single goddamned job we ever do - same as always. Instead I get clueless looks (or tones of voice) like it's the first time I've ever asked for it. If I don't take the initiative, they will just assume it's being done.
I think the problem is that what I need is (or should be) so goddamned simple, that it feels stupid to get up in arms about it, but if I don't, then goddamn it and fuck...
Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck FUCK...
This has been another go fuck yourself Revit moment - brought to you by the fucking assholes and faggots that 'develop', sell, propagate, and use Revit. Even when you aren't using it, it somehow still finds a way to get in the way of your productivity.
Fuck Revit, Fuck Autodesk, Fuck Reviteers, Fuck Revitards, and Fuck Goddamned Incompetent Motherfucking Fuckfaced Fuckheads.
They can all eat a bag of dicks. And I don't want to find half of them shoved up their asses like last time. EAT YOUR DICKS.
Sincerely,
<<<[[[SKuLLFuCK]]]>>>
Next Time: I Rip Off Some Reviteers Head And Shit Down His Fucking Throat.
Tuesday, April 11, 2017
Model Student
Salutations Fuckheads!
I received a hilarious e-mail this morning containing a link to a Revit model for a project. I immediately sent it back and told the guy whose job it is that he needed to request a CAD file of the floor plan.
It feels so damn good to be able to tell people who send me Revit shit to fuck off. For a second I pondered what it would be like if I had to worry about opening their Revit model to work in it, or set up my own model and link theirs in.
Then I laughed and shook my head - why would anybody fucking do that? It would be the equivalent of coming to work and slamming your dick in a drawer. Now, I'm sure there are some people out there who get off on shit like that, but it would definitely cut into your ability to be productive.
I'm kind of half hoping that they come back and say that 'the project has to be done in Revit' (it's a government job, so these other poor sad fuckers probably do have to do it in Revit), not realizing that we couldn't give less of a shit if we tried.
I could just see some brain damaged fuck trying to pry open our eyelids in a futile attempt to insert the Revit dick into our eye sockets 'why don't you want the Revit dick fucking your skull?'. It wouldn't surprise me in the least.
What would be even funnier is if they tried to do an end run around me and try to get someone to come down from above (after somehow justifying throwing away thousands of dollars on a Revit license - and a machine capable of running it) and tell me that 'now we're doing it in Revit' without knowing what the fuck that even means.
In that event, I would be reminded again why I'm so glad I'm only doing this kind of work because I enjoy it, and minus the enjoyment (i.e. plus Revit), I would simply go find something else equally lucrative to do that doesn't involve my dick, a drawer, and slamming.
Get Fucked!
-SF
Next Time: WTF?
Edit: they responded by sending me an export from their Revit model consisting of a .zip file containing 148 items - I'm not sure if this was because they are fucking idiots, if they were being sarcastic (or both). Regardless - fuck them with the force of a million suns.
I received a hilarious e-mail this morning containing a link to a Revit model for a project. I immediately sent it back and told the guy whose job it is that he needed to request a CAD file of the floor plan.
It feels so damn good to be able to tell people who send me Revit shit to fuck off. For a second I pondered what it would be like if I had to worry about opening their Revit model to work in it, or set up my own model and link theirs in.
Then I laughed and shook my head - why would anybody fucking do that? It would be the equivalent of coming to work and slamming your dick in a drawer. Now, I'm sure there are some people out there who get off on shit like that, but it would definitely cut into your ability to be productive.
I'm kind of half hoping that they come back and say that 'the project has to be done in Revit' (it's a government job, so these other poor sad fuckers probably do have to do it in Revit), not realizing that we couldn't give less of a shit if we tried.
I could just see some brain damaged fuck trying to pry open our eyelids in a futile attempt to insert the Revit dick into our eye sockets 'why don't you want the Revit dick fucking your skull?'. It wouldn't surprise me in the least.
What would be even funnier is if they tried to do an end run around me and try to get someone to come down from above (after somehow justifying throwing away thousands of dollars on a Revit license - and a machine capable of running it) and tell me that 'now we're doing it in Revit' without knowing what the fuck that even means.
In that event, I would be reminded again why I'm so glad I'm only doing this kind of work because I enjoy it, and minus the enjoyment (i.e. plus Revit), I would simply go find something else equally lucrative to do that doesn't involve my dick, a drawer, and slamming.
Get Fucked!
-SF
Next Time: WTF?
Edit: they responded by sending me an export from their Revit model consisting of a .zip file containing 148 items - I'm not sure if this was because they are fucking idiots, if they were being sarcastic (or both). Regardless - fuck them with the force of a million suns.
Thursday, March 23, 2017
Phased Out
Salutations.
So I've been working on a large scale project that would already be elaborate enough, but has been made even more of a clusterfuck thanks to it being broken down into phases. I actually don't know what software the Architect/Engineer are using to develop their plans - although based on how shitty they look, Revit is a pretty good bet.
I started the project (which I've probably talked about before), and did the first phase (which was rather huge) to completion, when I received what was ostensibly the second phase drawings from the electrical engineer (they sent the wrong system drawings the first time). I was confused to see that what they were referring to as 'phase 2' was actually half of the building that I had originally designed as Phase 1.
I made the mistake of assuming that they knew what they were doing - but it seemed logical, because they had separate systems, and were basically two buildings that made up a ring. I went ahead and broke them out into Phase 1 and Phase 2 to match, but then a few weeks later I received a panicked phone call from our guy (in one of our out-of-state offices) who had been told by the electrical contractor that the Phase 2 I had issued was part of Phase 1.
Fortunately I had already completed what I thought was Phase 3 (part of the problem is that nobody I talk to has any fucking clue what is supposed to be in each phase - despite there being very clear terminology that could be being used to describe each one, instead of just numbering them), and so I told him to give those drawings to the electrical contractor while I figured out what the hell was going on (because they sure as fuck weren't going to).
My contact with the electrical engineer was no help, so I bypassed him and contacted the architect, who cleared up the confusion (or at least clarified where the confusion had originated). For some reason the electrical engineer had broken down Phase 1 into two 'packages' (meaning I had done it correctly the first time, and only became confused when they resent their second package for no discernible reason).
I went ahead and put Phase 1 back the way it was, changed Phase 3 to Phase 2, and then got started on the actual Phase 3 - which is now on hold because I'm trying to dig through a pile of comments on a separate project (while others pile up). I had already made some adjustments, and received a accusatory e-mail (from the same guy who was panicking about the phased project - although it turns out that they had someone leave their office, meaning this guy just had everything fall in his lap) asking why I hadn't addressed the rest of the comments.
It turned out the reason I hadn't addressed the rest of the comments is because, while they received them a week ago, they HADN'T BOTHERED TO FUCKING SEND THEM TO ME. Most were fairly simple, but the last 2-3 have required me to get drawings from the mechanical engineer (since the electrical engineer for this project hasn't updated their drawings yet), and it was still a motherfucker to discern what the hell they were talking about.
It didn't help that the comments themselves were spread across a set of fire protection drawings (that I received first), an e-mail, another marked up set of drawings attached to that e-mail, AND a list of comments attached to the e-mail (that the comments in the e-mail referred to extensively). I just slapped it out before moving on to the next set of comments from an AHJ - two of which are just notes to add, but three of which refer to equipment not shown on the engineer's drawing.
The AHJ actually called me the other day to ask about two of the items (one of which is actually on the Mechanical comments but affects me anyway (which is why, unlike most people, I always read every comment and not just the ones directed at me). I forwarded on questions to someone who (hopefully - but doubtfully) has answers, and then (mostly to spite the motherfuckers working on the large multi-phased project) I decided to dive into a fairly simple project I received information for the other day and CAD files today.
It won't take long to finish, so I'll probably be back to Phase III by the end of the day. And when I get it done - there's a Phase IV, which is a free-standing building (so basically it's own little project) that I wouldn't have even known to look for if I had continued down the path that the electrical engineer had me on (because I would've assumed I was finished after doing the part I'm currently on).
We're going to be facing a lot of whacked out confusion over the next few weeks/months due to that guy leaving with several projects at varying levels of design, review, installation, commissioning, etc. - the only saving grace is that Revit is nowhere to be seen. I'm sure a Reviteer would be the first to point out that it has all kinds of tools for managing project phases, filtering etc. - which is great, except that then you would have to use Revit.
And I'd still be on Phase 1.
Fuck stupid people who refuse to communicate - and fuck Revit.
-Skullfuck
Next Time: Model Student
So I've been working on a large scale project that would already be elaborate enough, but has been made even more of a clusterfuck thanks to it being broken down into phases. I actually don't know what software the Architect/Engineer are using to develop their plans - although based on how shitty they look, Revit is a pretty good bet.
I started the project (which I've probably talked about before), and did the first phase (which was rather huge) to completion, when I received what was ostensibly the second phase drawings from the electrical engineer (they sent the wrong system drawings the first time). I was confused to see that what they were referring to as 'phase 2' was actually half of the building that I had originally designed as Phase 1.
I made the mistake of assuming that they knew what they were doing - but it seemed logical, because they had separate systems, and were basically two buildings that made up a ring. I went ahead and broke them out into Phase 1 and Phase 2 to match, but then a few weeks later I received a panicked phone call from our guy (in one of our out-of-state offices) who had been told by the electrical contractor that the Phase 2 I had issued was part of Phase 1.
Fortunately I had already completed what I thought was Phase 3 (part of the problem is that nobody I talk to has any fucking clue what is supposed to be in each phase - despite there being very clear terminology that could be being used to describe each one, instead of just numbering them), and so I told him to give those drawings to the electrical contractor while I figured out what the hell was going on (because they sure as fuck weren't going to).
My contact with the electrical engineer was no help, so I bypassed him and contacted the architect, who cleared up the confusion (or at least clarified where the confusion had originated). For some reason the electrical engineer had broken down Phase 1 into two 'packages' (meaning I had done it correctly the first time, and only became confused when they resent their second package for no discernible reason).
I went ahead and put Phase 1 back the way it was, changed Phase 3 to Phase 2, and then got started on the actual Phase 3 - which is now on hold because I'm trying to dig through a pile of comments on a separate project (while others pile up). I had already made some adjustments, and received a accusatory e-mail (from the same guy who was panicking about the phased project - although it turns out that they had someone leave their office, meaning this guy just had everything fall in his lap) asking why I hadn't addressed the rest of the comments.
It turned out the reason I hadn't addressed the rest of the comments is because, while they received them a week ago, they HADN'T BOTHERED TO FUCKING SEND THEM TO ME. Most were fairly simple, but the last 2-3 have required me to get drawings from the mechanical engineer (since the electrical engineer for this project hasn't updated their drawings yet), and it was still a motherfucker to discern what the hell they were talking about.
It didn't help that the comments themselves were spread across a set of fire protection drawings (that I received first), an e-mail, another marked up set of drawings attached to that e-mail, AND a list of comments attached to the e-mail (that the comments in the e-mail referred to extensively). I just slapped it out before moving on to the next set of comments from an AHJ - two of which are just notes to add, but three of which refer to equipment not shown on the engineer's drawing.
The AHJ actually called me the other day to ask about two of the items (one of which is actually on the Mechanical comments but affects me anyway (which is why, unlike most people, I always read every comment and not just the ones directed at me). I forwarded on questions to someone who (hopefully - but doubtfully) has answers, and then (mostly to spite the motherfuckers working on the large multi-phased project) I decided to dive into a fairly simple project I received information for the other day and CAD files today.
It won't take long to finish, so I'll probably be back to Phase III by the end of the day. And when I get it done - there's a Phase IV, which is a free-standing building (so basically it's own little project) that I wouldn't have even known to look for if I had continued down the path that the electrical engineer had me on (because I would've assumed I was finished after doing the part I'm currently on).
We're going to be facing a lot of whacked out confusion over the next few weeks/months due to that guy leaving with several projects at varying levels of design, review, installation, commissioning, etc. - the only saving grace is that Revit is nowhere to be seen. I'm sure a Reviteer would be the first to point out that it has all kinds of tools for managing project phases, filtering etc. - which is great, except that then you would have to use Revit.
And I'd still be on Phase 1.
Fuck stupid people who refuse to communicate - and fuck Revit.
-Skullfuck
Next Time: Model Student
Wednesday, March 22, 2017
2017 Revit Continues To Be A Thing?
Hola Amigos,
I haven't had much in the way of Revit bullshit to complain about lately - other than a handful of projects that keep coming to me that are exported into CAD from Revit, each requiring copious amounts of cleanup due to the vast number of mistakes, oversights, and garbage-in/garbage-out design techniques being used by the Revitards responsible for sharting them out.
I figured I would do a little bit more reading up on where Revit stood for 2017, and came across this review from 'Sean David Burke' (self-admitted volunteer member of the Autodesk alpha and beta testing programs and participant of the Autodesk AEC Blogger Council - meaning that if he had the Revit dick any deeper down his throat, it would pop out his ass and go back in his mouth again).
The line under his review title asked the question "Is the latest version of the popular BIM software upgrade-worthy?' The answer is obviously 'Who the fuck cares? You will be forced to switch to it', but despite this fact, he goes on to attempt to make the case that yes, this upgrade really is a good one.
I probably laughed for a good five minutes solid when, while mentioning the end of perpetual licenses, he says that 'customers will likely demand more for their investment'. Demand? Who the fuck does he think is using Revit? Autodesk's 'customers' are mostly companies purchasing licenses for their employees to use - so long as they are getting the licenses, they couldn't give two shits or a fuck if Revit ever improved anything.
With that said - the first 'improvement' on his list is... MODERNIZED TEXT EDITING!!! Congratulations! Autodesks 'flagship' software is now capable of editing text (no word on whether they ever figured out shape fonts - did I mention the same people who tried to force feed me Revit were the same ones who opted to switch from 'Archquik' to 'Comic Sans'?).
Yes, Revit 2017 has a 'completely redesigned text engine' that 'improves compatibility with imported and exported Autocad DWG files and creates a pixel-perfect WYSIWYG experience in the text editor' (yeah, that doesn't sound like someone flipped on the buzzword bullshit generator). You can now 'format the text with confidence, knowing it will look the way you intended'!!!
Then, after distracting us by mentioning that the text tool gets it's own ribbon menu (oh joyous day...), he mentions that projects that are brought into 2017 that have longer text notes may or may not read as intended and may or may not run into other graphics on the sheet due to 'overall height of characters in certain fonts, blah blah blah. In other words, you can be 'confident' that your carefully tweaked text will most likely be fucked up when you are forced to convert to 2017.
Next on the list is 'Improved Schedules and Tags Tools'. Since they decided to make an attempt at giving Revit word processing capabilities on par with Microsoft Word 95, I guess they decided they might as well get the schedules up to the level of Excel 3 or 4. Oh - and tags can hold formulas now - so everyone can just shut the fuck up about wanting that.
By item #3 'Enhanced ability to show depth in drawings', it's already getting padded out. I mean seriously - Revit needed MORE fucking view settings? Then it's off to the races with more buzzword bullshit like 'parametric flexing' and 'effecting large cascading changes'. He quickly moves on to 'Dynamo' - even though it's not actually a new feature in Revit 2017, but a standalone computational tool.
After watching Reviteers struggle for weeks on end to put out buildings that are mostly right-angles (with the occasional vaulted ceiling or curtain wall) I can't imagine how fucked a project would be if they were attempting to program Dynamo or Grasshopper for Rhino to generate an elaborate design. I'm sure large-scale firms have projects with budgets big enough to keep a couple of savants around to figure out the necessary algorithms, and more power to them, but pretending like this in any way benefits the vast majority of users is a fucking insult.
Least (and last) is #5 - an easy button for energy analysis. Besides the fact that he immediately jumps track into how it uses the cloud based 'Autodesk Green Studio' shows that this is, yet again, not an actual improvement of Revit, but just a way to access another existing piece of software. He then opines the fact that while 'AGBS' has had an intuitive dashboard makeover, it has not made its way into Revit (big surprise there).
Next is the requisite babbling about cloud-based applications, and the obvious need for additional improvements to Revit (get to demanding buddy!) before the vomit-inducing cost for the software (or more accurately, the right to use the software for a little while).
It's almost enough to make me say fuck Revit, fuck Revit users, and fuck Autodesk.
Until Skull We Fuck,
-SF
Next Time: Seriously - How Do These People Get Out Of Bed Without Hurting Themselves?
I haven't had much in the way of Revit bullshit to complain about lately - other than a handful of projects that keep coming to me that are exported into CAD from Revit, each requiring copious amounts of cleanup due to the vast number of mistakes, oversights, and garbage-in/garbage-out design techniques being used by the Revitards responsible for sharting them out.
I figured I would do a little bit more reading up on where Revit stood for 2017, and came across this review from 'Sean David Burke' (self-admitted volunteer member of the Autodesk alpha and beta testing programs and participant of the Autodesk AEC Blogger Council - meaning that if he had the Revit dick any deeper down his throat, it would pop out his ass and go back in his mouth again).
The line under his review title asked the question "Is the latest version of the popular BIM software upgrade-worthy?' The answer is obviously 'Who the fuck cares? You will be forced to switch to it', but despite this fact, he goes on to attempt to make the case that yes, this upgrade really is a good one.
I probably laughed for a good five minutes solid when, while mentioning the end of perpetual licenses, he says that 'customers will likely demand more for their investment'. Demand? Who the fuck does he think is using Revit? Autodesk's 'customers' are mostly companies purchasing licenses for their employees to use - so long as they are getting the licenses, they couldn't give two shits or a fuck if Revit ever improved anything.
With that said - the first 'improvement' on his list is... MODERNIZED TEXT EDITING!!! Congratulations! Autodesks 'flagship' software is now capable of editing text (no word on whether they ever figured out shape fonts - did I mention the same people who tried to force feed me Revit were the same ones who opted to switch from 'Archquik' to 'Comic Sans'?).
Yes, Revit 2017 has a 'completely redesigned text engine' that 'improves compatibility with imported and exported Autocad DWG files and creates a pixel-perfect WYSIWYG experience in the text editor' (yeah, that doesn't sound like someone flipped on the buzzword bullshit generator). You can now 'format the text with confidence, knowing it will look the way you intended'!!!
Then, after distracting us by mentioning that the text tool gets it's own ribbon menu (oh joyous day...), he mentions that projects that are brought into 2017 that have longer text notes may or may not read as intended and may or may not run into other graphics on the sheet due to 'overall height of characters in certain fonts, blah blah blah. In other words, you can be 'confident' that your carefully tweaked text will most likely be fucked up when you are forced to convert to 2017.
Next on the list is 'Improved Schedules and Tags Tools'. Since they decided to make an attempt at giving Revit word processing capabilities on par with Microsoft Word 95, I guess they decided they might as well get the schedules up to the level of Excel 3 or 4. Oh - and tags can hold formulas now - so everyone can just shut the fuck up about wanting that.
By item #3 'Enhanced ability to show depth in drawings', it's already getting padded out. I mean seriously - Revit needed MORE fucking view settings? Then it's off to the races with more buzzword bullshit like 'parametric flexing' and 'effecting large cascading changes'. He quickly moves on to 'Dynamo' - even though it's not actually a new feature in Revit 2017, but a standalone computational tool.
After watching Reviteers struggle for weeks on end to put out buildings that are mostly right-angles (with the occasional vaulted ceiling or curtain wall) I can't imagine how fucked a project would be if they were attempting to program Dynamo or Grasshopper for Rhino to generate an elaborate design. I'm sure large-scale firms have projects with budgets big enough to keep a couple of savants around to figure out the necessary algorithms, and more power to them, but pretending like this in any way benefits the vast majority of users is a fucking insult.
Least (and last) is #5 - an easy button for energy analysis. Besides the fact that he immediately jumps track into how it uses the cloud based 'Autodesk Green Studio' shows that this is, yet again, not an actual improvement of Revit, but just a way to access another existing piece of software. He then opines the fact that while 'AGBS' has had an intuitive dashboard makeover, it has not made its way into Revit (big surprise there).
Next is the requisite babbling about cloud-based applications, and the obvious need for additional improvements to Revit (get to demanding buddy!) before the vomit-inducing cost for the software (or more accurately, the right to use the software for a little while).
It's almost enough to make me say fuck Revit, fuck Revit users, and fuck Autodesk.
Until Skull We Fuck,
-SF
Next Time: Seriously - How Do These People Get Out Of Bed Without Hurting Themselves?
Wednesday, February 15, 2017
Diverting The Bus
Hello Again!
Back-to-back installments of the Skullfuck - aren't you lucky?
While fixing the 'typical' bullshit this morning (it's funny, the most stressful shit I've had to deal with at this job still pales in comparison to the best day I had fighting with Revit), I had somebody ask me about some additions to an industrial building I did a while back.
They told me that there were two remote panels missing (that were shown on the drawings we received) and that the main control panel was shown in the wrong place. I verified that this was indeed the case, and a few minutes later the office manager came by asking about the same thing. He was concerned because we would most likely have to eat the cost of the 'missing' panels.
Fortunately, I don't throw anything away. I used to have people laugh about the number of boxes I kept in my office (five years worth at any given time), but besides covering my (and the companies) ass on more than one occasion, it was also a visual representation of the amount of work I had cranked out over that time period (instead of sitting around whittling my dick in Revit).
Within a few minutes I was able to produce a drawing that I had used while discussing the project with the guy who originally brought it to me. It wasn't exactly what I was hoping to find (someone's markup telling me to take the panels out), but it was the next best thing. Basically, the guy had made changes to the design based on what he thought they needed (whereas I would've done it exactly as shown).
Based on that drawing, the office manager was able to see that the changes were obviously intentional and not an oversight on my part. Now, that's partly a matter of personal pride - but also reflects on my professionalism. It's hard to say whether or not the guy who made the changes would've owned up to it (were it not for having hard evidence), but fortunately I don't have to worry about it now.
I don't go around all paranoid thinking that people are out to fuck me over, but experience has shown that it's better to never give them an opportunity in the first place - and I'll definitely have my eye on this guy in the future if he ever tells me to deviate from a design in the future.
It's the same attitude I took all those years ago when someone tried to fuck me over by convincing me to throw away the tools I continue to use with great success in exchange for a bag full of broken screwdrivers - and I responded with a resounding 'FUCK YOU'.
Especially considering that it was the same people I had to constantly keep an eye on to keep them from throwing me under the bus who were trying to convince me to do it.
Fuck that. Fuck Revit, and if you don't like it Fuck You!
-SkullFuck
Next Time: 2017 Revit Continues The March Into WTF Territory?
Back-to-back installments of the Skullfuck - aren't you lucky?
While fixing the 'typical' bullshit this morning (it's funny, the most stressful shit I've had to deal with at this job still pales in comparison to the best day I had fighting with Revit), I had somebody ask me about some additions to an industrial building I did a while back.
They told me that there were two remote panels missing (that were shown on the drawings we received) and that the main control panel was shown in the wrong place. I verified that this was indeed the case, and a few minutes later the office manager came by asking about the same thing. He was concerned because we would most likely have to eat the cost of the 'missing' panels.
Fortunately, I don't throw anything away. I used to have people laugh about the number of boxes I kept in my office (five years worth at any given time), but besides covering my (and the companies) ass on more than one occasion, it was also a visual representation of the amount of work I had cranked out over that time period (instead of sitting around whittling my dick in Revit).
Within a few minutes I was able to produce a drawing that I had used while discussing the project with the guy who originally brought it to me. It wasn't exactly what I was hoping to find (someone's markup telling me to take the panels out), but it was the next best thing. Basically, the guy had made changes to the design based on what he thought they needed (whereas I would've done it exactly as shown).
Based on that drawing, the office manager was able to see that the changes were obviously intentional and not an oversight on my part. Now, that's partly a matter of personal pride - but also reflects on my professionalism. It's hard to say whether or not the guy who made the changes would've owned up to it (were it not for having hard evidence), but fortunately I don't have to worry about it now.
I don't go around all paranoid thinking that people are out to fuck me over, but experience has shown that it's better to never give them an opportunity in the first place - and I'll definitely have my eye on this guy in the future if he ever tells me to deviate from a design in the future.
It's the same attitude I took all those years ago when someone tried to fuck me over by convincing me to throw away the tools I continue to use with great success in exchange for a bag full of broken screwdrivers - and I responded with a resounding 'FUCK YOU'.
Especially considering that it was the same people I had to constantly keep an eye on to keep them from throwing me under the bus who were trying to convince me to do it.
Fuck that. Fuck Revit, and if you don't like it Fuck You!
-SkullFuck
Next Time: 2017 Revit Continues The March Into WTF Territory?
Can You Hear Me Now?
Hello Sunshine!
It's funny, I spent years fighting the good fight by trying to keep up with the constant changes that result from indecisive project owners, incompetent design staff, and a total lack of fucks given on the part of those who decided to throw Revit into the midst of an already unstable system under the delusion that all of that other shit would somehow work itself out.
I sidestepped that shit show, but still find myself downstream from it from time to time, which makes it necessary to take steps to prevent myself from winding up wading in fecal matter. I received a call the other day from someone in one of our other offices asking about (yet another) hotel where someone reviewing our drawings pointed out that we hadn't put the necessary devices into hearing impaired guest units.
I pointed out to the caller that I had responded to these comments several months ago with some pertinent questions, but received no response (meaning they never read my e-mail, or read it and forgot about it) I forwarded the e-mail to them (yes, forwarded the same e-mail that I had already sent them).
Now, even though I have considerable experience in the skill of convincing people who don't want to deal with their own projects to pay attention for long enough to grasp the intricacies, it can still be difficult to get them to understand the questions that I ask require more than two word responses (and may actually require them to do their fucking jobs).
In this case, after reviewing the drawings we received from the engineer, it became clear that there was no way to actually determine which guest units were hearing impaired. Their typical units only had normal and ADA plans - although I did find one note buried on one of the sheets about hearing impaired unit requirements.
While looking at the list of units they claimed were hearing impaired I started to see that (most of) these units had a '-CF' added to the end of the unit type (although what '-CF' was supposed to indicate was nowhere on the drawings). Looking harder, I found that even that wasn't consistent throughout all of the floors (with some '-CF' units not being on their list, and some on their list without '-CF'.
The one difference between what I used to do and what I do now, is that when there are mistakes, inconsistencies, etc. on the drawings we receive (or changes come along later), we can charge to make these changes. It would sometimes happen at my old job (if the changes were being driven by the owner, and the project manager had the sack to ask for more money), but it's standard practice here.
It still requires getting the project manager on board with the fact that the information we received was incomplete, and that it wasn't an oversight on our part. Fortunately (as always), because I'm using CAD, I was able to put together updated plans quickly so they can see the extent of the changes that were necessary.
I doubt that the explanation that I provided them (and outlined here) will ever get to the people who made the comments (although when I send these drawings - I'm going to reiterate it again). I guess I shouldn't be surprised though - since every project I've ever done with 'typical' units required grabbing someone by the face and convincing them that units requiring special attention need to be brought to my attention.
If I'm successful in making my case, they might even keep me in the loop when changes that affect me are made (the second the decision to make those changes is made - and not when those changes finally make their way onto drawings/models).
Revitards made a clusterfuck out of a the last building with typical units I ever had the displeasure of looking at in Revit (by trying to detail out a specific unit in the overall plan for each 'typical' unit). Even after extensive planning, I still had to hold their hand through the process (imagine that).
Now that I'm one step removed from that whole process, I have to rely on someone taking the initiative to send me updated drawings - but as I mentioned earlier, whether they give them to me now, or wait until later, they are getting charged.
Fuck incompetent morons, and since there is a good chance their incompetence is being multiplied exponentially through the use of Revit, then fuck it too.
Now Go Fuck Yourself,
-Skullfuck
Next Time: Diverting The Bus
It's funny, I spent years fighting the good fight by trying to keep up with the constant changes that result from indecisive project owners, incompetent design staff, and a total lack of fucks given on the part of those who decided to throw Revit into the midst of an already unstable system under the delusion that all of that other shit would somehow work itself out.
I sidestepped that shit show, but still find myself downstream from it from time to time, which makes it necessary to take steps to prevent myself from winding up wading in fecal matter. I received a call the other day from someone in one of our other offices asking about (yet another) hotel where someone reviewing our drawings pointed out that we hadn't put the necessary devices into hearing impaired guest units.
I pointed out to the caller that I had responded to these comments several months ago with some pertinent questions, but received no response (meaning they never read my e-mail, or read it and forgot about it) I forwarded the e-mail to them (yes, forwarded the same e-mail that I had already sent them).
Now, even though I have considerable experience in the skill of convincing people who don't want to deal with their own projects to pay attention for long enough to grasp the intricacies, it can still be difficult to get them to understand the questions that I ask require more than two word responses (and may actually require them to do their fucking jobs).
In this case, after reviewing the drawings we received from the engineer, it became clear that there was no way to actually determine which guest units were hearing impaired. Their typical units only had normal and ADA plans - although I did find one note buried on one of the sheets about hearing impaired unit requirements.
While looking at the list of units they claimed were hearing impaired I started to see that (most of) these units had a '-CF' added to the end of the unit type (although what '-CF' was supposed to indicate was nowhere on the drawings). Looking harder, I found that even that wasn't consistent throughout all of the floors (with some '-CF' units not being on their list, and some on their list without '-CF'.
The one difference between what I used to do and what I do now, is that when there are mistakes, inconsistencies, etc. on the drawings we receive (or changes come along later), we can charge to make these changes. It would sometimes happen at my old job (if the changes were being driven by the owner, and the project manager had the sack to ask for more money), but it's standard practice here.
It still requires getting the project manager on board with the fact that the information we received was incomplete, and that it wasn't an oversight on our part. Fortunately (as always), because I'm using CAD, I was able to put together updated plans quickly so they can see the extent of the changes that were necessary.
I doubt that the explanation that I provided them (and outlined here) will ever get to the people who made the comments (although when I send these drawings - I'm going to reiterate it again). I guess I shouldn't be surprised though - since every project I've ever done with 'typical' units required grabbing someone by the face and convincing them that units requiring special attention need to be brought to my attention.
If I'm successful in making my case, they might even keep me in the loop when changes that affect me are made (the second the decision to make those changes is made - and not when those changes finally make their way onto drawings/models).
Revitards made a clusterfuck out of a the last building with typical units I ever had the displeasure of looking at in Revit (by trying to detail out a specific unit in the overall plan for each 'typical' unit). Even after extensive planning, I still had to hold their hand through the process (imagine that).
Now that I'm one step removed from that whole process, I have to rely on someone taking the initiative to send me updated drawings - but as I mentioned earlier, whether they give them to me now, or wait until later, they are getting charged.
Fuck incompetent morons, and since there is a good chance their incompetence is being multiplied exponentially through the use of Revit, then fuck it too.
Now Go Fuck Yourself,
-Skullfuck
Next Time: Diverting The Bus
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