Monday, June 5, 2017

How Many Notes Would a Keynote Key if a Keynote Could Key Notes?

All the Revit Shit That's Fit To Fucking Print.

So I'm kicking ass and taking names - when I see a comment from reader 'Christopher Lord' pop up.  Apparently he was running into issues with Key Notes (not surprising considering that Revit has had issues with Key Notes not working properly ever since Revit has been a thing).

Some quick googling came up with a 'known issue' (it's always a 'known issue - and Autodesk is totally working on it man...) with Key Notes disappearing when upgrading from 2016 to 2017 (no big deal there right?).  At my previous firm we would usually come in one day to find that some dipshit had saved the Revit file to the newest version, meaning that we got to jump feet (and dick) first into the newest version.

So there you are, job almost ready to kick out, and BANG - keynotes are fucked.  You google it, praying to whatever god you believe in that somebody has found some kind of 'workaround' (maybe involving adjusting one of the 1/4 trillion plus view settings).

Hell yes - there it is!  Someone describing exactly the problem I'm having, complete with a simple workaround! We're saved!!!  Oh wait - it isn't working.  Ok - breathe, back to google.  Another hit!  Oh... it's just someone begging for a solution - and someone else 'helpfully' pointing out that it's a 'known issue'.

One of the funniest I ran across was a guy saying that 'this issue has shaken my love for Revit to the core':

That's what you get for having love for Revit you dickless piece of shit 'DMapes'.  It fucks you directly in the ass.  If I had time to waste, I could probably find where this guy had berated other people who were forced into Reviting and were running into fucked up problem after fucked up problem for not sharing his 'love'.

I've read countless instances of people leaning on Revit - putting all of their trust into it to do right by them, only to have it fail miserably.  The fact is - YOU CANNOT TRUST REVIT.  It's a fucking lie - propagated by people operating off of what is called the 'sunk cost fallacy'.

Basically, if you are a firm, you've spent literal shit-tons of money to buy Revit licenses, upgrade computers, servers, networks, etc. to handle it, had it eat profits as your employees struggle to figure out how to force the goddamned thing to shart out a passable set of drawings (and even more if you wasted money on 'training'.

If you are a user - you've spent god only knows how many hours beating on Revit, fucking with settings, watching stupid videos, reading stupid blogs, hunting the internet for shreds of information on how to make this goddamned thing work as advertised - and watched as projects that should've been cranked out in days take weeks, months, or even years as teams of Revitards all shit on and/or fling shit all over each other.

There's a point you reach where you won't (or can't) admit that it's fucked - because rather than the blame falling squarely on the shoulders of the ones churning out the garbage software, it's been you - pushing yourself (and others) off the cliff, swearing the whole time that 'it gets better'.

Supposedly the 2017.2 version fixed the Key Note problem (again - since this isn't the first time this shit happened - both to Key Notes specifically, and any number of other things in between updates - or when it just decides to take a shit one day).  Now - the problem is, installing that update may very well fuck something else up.

And you won't know until you are already sailing through the air - legs, dong, and balls flapping in the breeze - heading towards the giant Revit wood chipper at the bottom of the cliff.

Fuck That.

Fuck Revit, Fuck Autodesk, Fuck Revitards, Fuck Revit Gurus, and fuck anyone unwilling to admit they got FUCKED by Revit.


Next Time: Path-etic.


  1. I was just about to comment on your previous post regarding this key note bullshit, but it looks like you beat me to it.

    "So there you are, job almost ready to kick out, and BANG - keynotes are fucked. You google it, praying to whatever god you believe in that somebody has found some kind of 'workaround' (maybe involving adjusting one of the 1/4 trillion plus view settings)."

    Well, let me tell you - this just fucking happened to a few of us yesterday at my firm. And it was on a rather large project containing well over a hundred electrical sheets. Rather than performing actual, necessary, design and engineering work, we instead spent hours upon hours attempting to fix a problem that should not have existed in the first place. How could a feature so fucking trivial as key notes be so broken?

    Oh, and in case you're wondering, version 2017.2 doesn't fix it.

    But hey! There's some good news! Did you check out the awesome new features in Revit 2018? We can now manually define the circuit path for any branch circuit or feeder, resulting in, I would assume, more accurate voltage drop calculations. I think I'll stick with SKM PowerTools and my Excel-based voltage drop calculator. You know, because they actually work. Expect to see some posts about "known issues" with this new feature within the next year. But don't worry - Autodesk will be working on it.

  2. I re-read the claim about 2017.2 fixing they keynote problem - and it turned out they were installing and getting ready to test it (probably someone at Autodesk told them that to shut them up). I'm sure they were thrilled when it failed to do so.

    The manual circuit path 'feature' is going to be bullshit because nobody is ever going to route the conduit the way you design it.

    Oh, and it will almost certainly break something else.

  3. I'm a Revit power user, I'm a Revit Guru of 10+ years.
    All I can say is.....

    Fuck Revit in the arse with a rusty spoon.

    Its the million little things that have started to weigh on me. The million little things that haven't been fixed in the DECADE I have been mastering this software. A FUCKEN DECADE. Is it too much to ask that they fix shit I was pointing out 10 fucken years ago.

    Fuck you Autodesk you piece of shit.
    I cant wait to have my own firm and send all of your stupid products to the shit filled depths of hell where they belong. Fuck revit, fuck autocad, fuck max, fuck the lot of them.

    All those fucktards that gloss over Revits myriad of glaring flaws, those fucken revit cheerleaders, can go eat a fat dick covered in dog shit. Eat cock you fucks, its your willingness to bend over and be arse fucked that lets this software exist in its current fucked up state where they don't feel compelled to fix ALL THE FUCKEN PROBLEMS.

    Fuck all of you.