Tuesday, August 26, 2014

Sanctimonious Motherfuckers & You (A Guide)

There are typically two kinds of people in the workplace.  Those who do, and those who stand in the way of those who do.  In any kind of rational world those who do would be rewarded for their efforts while those who stand in the way would be marginalized.

Enter the Sanctimonious Motherfucker, who, rather than doing, ingratiates him/herself with higher-ups, and through the use of smoke and mirrors (and copious amounts of ass-kissing) puts themselves in a position where they can simultaneously do nothing, while throwing roadblocks in the way of those who are attempting to do something.

They might fill some kind of necessary position, but you can be rest-assured that the Sanctimonious Motherfucker will figure out a way to erode their responsibilities, while giving the higher-ups the impression that they are finding creative ways to save time/money/resources.

Nobody is safe from the S.M. because the S.M. lives in constant fear of anyone who might upstage them, or take them out of the good graces of the people they have worked so hard to convince of the value they add to the firm.

They will throw someone under the bus faster (and more viciously) than even imaginable, and the more effort someone puts into making sure they can defend themselves against the S.M., the more of a threat they pose.

It's an age old problem - someone manages to get the ear of upper management and convinces them of some plan of action (regardless of whether or not they even understand the intricacies and requirements to get the job done).

This is the source of the vast majority of arbitrary rules and counter-productive processes.   Again - in a rational world (or at least within a rational firm) these types of people, rules, and processes would be out on their sanctimonious asses in a heartbeat.

Instead, the voices, opinions, and rationale from those who do are drowned out at the source by those who aren't content simply spinning their own wheels or finding ways to avoid work, but want to make sure that nobody else can be productive (or happy).

This fundamental disconnect between the people whose primary interest is supposed to be the overall health and productivity of a firm and those who work the hardest to make it a reality is a frustrating one - made that much more maddening by the Sanctimonious Motherfucker.

I can't offer much in the way of advice for how to deal with this sub-species, all I can do is warn you that they are out there, and that they are, indeed, motherfuckers. 

Most people are already aware of this dynamic at some level - but even then, many will suffer crippling self-doubt and disillusion as they watch their contribution go unappreciated or unnoticed, and get tired of having their hand slapped back every time they make an effort to improve the system.

Meanwhile that Sanctimonious Motherfucker will be sucking the collective dicks of management.

Fuck all of the Sanctimonious Motherfuckers out there.  Fuck their milquetoast, sheep-eyed, drooling, dick-filled faces.  Fuck their incessant ass kissing.

Fuck Autodesk for using these very same S.M.'s to force the Revit dick into the eyesockets of designers everywhere.

Fuck every single person willingly using, propagating, or defending Revit.  Fuck their buzzword laden speeches, self-important bullshit, and (as always) if you don't like it - FUCK OFF AND DIE BITCH!!!!!


  1. I have followed your blog for some time now. I often wonder if we work for the same firm. Your posts are lock and step with the bullshit I encounter everyday here as a mechanical designer. Our SM has decided to go all in with Revit and skullfuck the whole lot of us. Keep them coming. FUCK Revit, Fuck the SM's and FUCK the Architects that convinced the SM to Skullfuck us!!!!!!!

  2. You will notice unmistakable similarities because we both work in the same system - one that has been broken systematically by incompetence. The confused 'what did I do?' response to my last post is a perfect example. Reject their bullshit - call it what it is, and never relent.